It should be obvious now, if you've read a number of my film reviews, that I have a soft spot for those of a Medieval bent, but have no problem with foreign movies, subtitles, epic durations, black and white, symbolism, non-linear storytelling etc
However, the much-lauded Czech film Marketa Lazarová sorely tested my patience with its plodding, yet rambling, narrative that unfolded at a glacial pace and suffered with a surfeit of "telling rather than showing".
At its core is a basic Hatfield & McCoy feud between two neighbouring clans in 13th Century Czechoslovakia - one headed by the bandit Kozlik The Goat (Josef Kemr), the other by struggling businessman Lazar (Michal Kozuch).
It's a harsh winter, but matters only get worse when Kozlik's family kidnap a nobleman from Saxony, which provokes the King to send his representative to crush the villains and rescue the young man.
Kozlik tries to entice Lazar into siding with him against the King, but when that stratagem fails, Kozlik's son Mikolás (Frantisek Velecký) kidnaps Lazar's virginal daughter Marketa Lazarova (Magda Vásáryová), who had been preparing herself to become a nun.
Bizarrely - in an almost Twilight-like twist of logic - Marketa eventually falls in love with Mikolás and the last third of the movie plays out against the backdrop of their doomed romance.
On paper, the plot sounds quite inspiring and straight-forward, and about 90 minutes in there's a really impressive battle scene when the King's forces, led by Captain Beer (Zdenek Kryzánek), attack the Kozlik hill-top fortress.
But away from this, everything moves so slowly and, even with the frequent "chapter introductions" that are thrown up on screen (as you would find in Victorian novels) to help explain what was going on, it feels as though the story is jumping around - but without any rhyme or reason.
There are also moments of casual European full-frontal nudity and one extended, surreal dream sequence but these just come across as arbitrary and without any real purpose to the narrative.
And it's a 159 minutes long. And you feel every, single minute.
Some of the praise heaped on this film is for its lack of special effects in its fight sequences, but conversely it's worth pointing out that Mikolás has a one-armed brother, Adam (Ivan Palúch), and on a number of occasions you can tell his "lost" arm is simply tucked inside his baggy shirt!
Marketa Lazarová is also quite dark, in appearance as well as tone, often making it difficult to follow what is going on. This also isn't helped by the subtitles - which suffer not only by often being unclear who they are associated with but also I suspect some weak translating along the way.
The occasionally nonsensical subtitles made me strongly suspect that the film makes a lot more sense in its native tongue, if you can remove the barrier of having to rely on someone else's condensed translation of possibly complex or multi-layered ideas.
A number of pretentious and dull film periodicals, which take movies way too seriously, are quoted on the DVD box cover as proclaiming Marketa Lazarová "the best historical film ever made" and "the most convincing film about the Middle Ages made anywhere".
Don't believe them. It may have been when it was made in 1967, but there have since been far better, far more accessible and far less tedious films made about the Middle Ages.
I had been really looking forward to this as I had read such great things about it online, but in the end Marketa Lazarová was a major disappointment and very mundane after the ridiculously inflated praise it has somehow garnered.
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