Grimm's Snow White (2012)

Remember the other week when I was reviewing fairy tale films? Well, I thought I'd kick off this week of Asylum movies with one of their "fairy tale"-inspired offerings: Grimm's Snow White.

Once again The Asylum proves that their strength lies in fantasy stories with this joyously gonzo, kitchen-sink spin on the story of Snow White that throws elves, dragons and magical falling stars into the traditional mix.

On the other hand there are no dwarves (that's where the elves come in - it being easier to stick pointed ears on an extra than turn them into little people) or poisoned apples (there's a poisoned ring instead) in this tale.

A long time ago a star fell from the skies and where it fell a magical flame sprung up that created the dragons and the elves.

Queen Gwendolyn (Jane March) of Whitevale wants to get her hands on the magical flame - the source of the elves' magic - but it is in the neighbouring land of North Phalia.

So she engineers the death of her husband and then sets about winning the heart of the North Phalian prince, Alexander (Jamie Thomas King).

Unfortunately for the queen, Alexander has fallen for her drippy step-daughter Snow White (Eliza Bennett).

Therefore, the queen arranges for Snow to meet with an unfortunate accident in the woods at the hands of her huntsman... only she is rescued by the elves.

Initially the elves, especially the outspoken Orlando (see what they did there?), played by Alan Burgon, don't want to get involved in the affairs of humans for fear it will bring further oppression down on them.

Eventually, of course, Snow wins them round and everything culminates in a deliriously lacklustre woodland battle between about a dozen elves and a similar number of the queen's troops (this is supposed to be a major battle, by the way).

Some of the acting, especially from the heavily-accented extras, is a bit stilted, the CGI dragons are pretty poor and the queen's CGI hunting dogs have clearly been based on the Garmr from its 2011 Thor-mockbuster Almighty Thor.

Yet there are elements (albeit minuscule) of an inventive story here - even if, ultimately, it comes to nothing.

There are hints of an interesting take on elves and the whole deal with the Veridian Flame is a really nice touch which, hopefully, the Asylum might pick up and run with in another of their fantasy flicks. It seems too good a concept to dismiss as simply a MacGuffin in Grimm's Snow White.

I'm not sure what went wrong with the non-fire-breathing dragon though as I've seen better in Asylum flicks - perhaps they blew the budget on rubber elf ears and costuming, as there's a distinctly well-tailored Georgian feel to many of the outfits worn by the human characters.

Eliza Bennett is rather unimpressive as Snow White and totally overshadowed by Jane March's evil step-mother, clearly loving the chance to devour some scenery in her wonderfully melodramatic role.

Snow White - Fairest Of Them All (2001)

Snow White - Fairest Of Them All is a ropey, old TV movie that was dusted down and given a new name so it could be rereleased on DVD to co-incide with the cinematic début of Snow White And The Huntsman in 2012.

Using extreme magical logic, it begins with the birth of Snow White and the death of her mother Josephine (Vera Farmiga).

Her father John (Tom Irwin) wanders off into the snow to find milk for the infant, but instead frees a trapped troll (Clancy Brown).

The wish-granting monster not only provides milk for baby Snow White, but makes John a king of his own kingdom.

The troll then transforms his own sister, Elspeth (Miranda Richardson), into a queen for John (as he cannot bring the dead Josephine back to life).

Years pass and Snow White (Smallville's Kristen Kreuk) turns 16, but ageless Elspeth is bored of her enchanted husband and step-child, so seeks fresh meat when young prince Alfred (Tyron Leitso) arrives to woo the princess.

When he spurns the wicked queen, Elspeth turns him into a bear, then charges smitten courtier Hector (Jose Zuniga) with leading Snow into the woods and cutting out her heart.

Snow flees and ends up in the company of the seven colour-coded dwarves (think Teletubbies, but dressed in charity shop cast-offs), who are actually elemental representations of the days of the week as well as weather-sprites.

Miranda Richardson's Elspeth is a delightfully loopy, fairy tale cougar (you can't help but smile when she makes her pass at the young prince and he runs a mile) and definitely comes off best when compared to Kristin Kreuk's hippy, whiny little Snow White.

This story is full of bright colours and wild magic - especially where the Queen's mirror is concerned (it flies, it spies, it transforms people, it shrinks things, it turns them to stone etc etc) - but while clearly aimed at a very young audience, the surprisingly subtle moral of the piece might go over their heads.

Elspeth is given everything by her brother, has access to powerful magics, but is never satisfied and is ultimately brought down by her own hubris. In a sense the traditional story of Snow White is simply a test of character by Clancy Brown's character of his sister.

Snow White And The Huntsman (2012)

Snow White And The Huntsman is the classic tale of Snow White given the full-on Lord Of The Rings treatment.

Director Rupert Sanders was clearly taking lessons from Peter Jackson with his presentation of a fully-developed fantasy world.

Unfortunately, for all its sumptuous production values, the script by Evan Daugherty, John Lee Hancock and Hossein Amini is quite flawed - the pacing is rather measured, to put it politely (most would call it slow), the magic mirror (a key element of the story and a great special effect) is forgotten about a third of the way into the story, and the central characters of the Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) and Snow's childhood sweetheart, William (Sam Claflin) both serve the same role in the movie. This duplication of roles is further highlighted by the script's failure to resolve either character's personal journey.

And all that brings us to Snow White herself. Kristen Stewart may have the whole Twilight thing under her belt and is reasonably easy on the eye, but she is totally devoid of charisma in this movie - this is never more evident than in her "rousing speech" to her father's subjects hiding out in the castle of Duke Hammond (Vincent Regan).

She is supposedly whipping them up into a frenzy of rebellion against the evil queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron), but totally fails to sell it. I couldn't imagine an army following her to the supermarket let alone into battle against a powerful, magical foe.

That said, the film gave us a well thought-out back story of how the witch Ravenna usurped Snow White's father and took over the kingdom - even if we are supposed to believe that for the decade (or longer) that Snow was kept imprisoned, the lone rebel Duke Hammond - father of William - was able to hold out against the queen and her mastery of the dark arts.

When Snow comes of age (and thus the queen is no longer "the fairest in the land"), she escapes captivity and flees into the well-realised Dark Forest.

Ravenna summons The Huntsman to track Snow down, on the promise that she will bring his dead wife back to life if he delivers. Realising that the queen's offer is an empty one, the Huntsman instead helps Snow to escape the forest and head towards Duke Hammond's castle.

On the way they are captured by the seven dwarf bandits - who count a number of famous faces amongst them: such as Ian McShane, Bob Hoskins, Ray Winstone, Nick Frost and Toby Jones.

And the dwarves are another strength of the film. Once you get over the initial shock of seeing such well-known faces on the bodies of little people, they are wholly convincing and wouldn't look out of place around the table at Bag End when Thorin and co pay a visit to Bilbo Baggins.

The dwarves then escort Snow and the Huntsman to their final destination, and play an integral part in the princess's scheme to get her kingdom back and avenge her father's death.

But of course the stand-out performance of the piece is Charlize Theron as the evil queen, who not only acts Kristen Stewart out of the picture but looks every inch the majestic evil sovereign, whatever make-up effects are piled on her to show the ageing cost of her magic.

There are even, early on, strong suggestions of an incestuous, Game Of Thrones-style relationship between Ravenna and her (twin?) brother Finn (Sam Spruell), but this, ultimately, being a children's movie that particular sub-plot also goes nowhere - although there is definitely a link of some kind between them as demonstrated when the Huntsman slays Finn.

Stylistically Snow White And The Huntsman is a visually impressive retelling of Snow White story, but the script has serious, basic issues that really should have been picked up during the film's development.