DEATHSTALKER WEEK: Barbarian - The Last Great Warrior King (2003)

A strange one this, although you'd expect nothing less coming from the stable of Roger Corman.

The 2003 movie Barbarian (with its totally meaningless subtitle of The Last Great Warrior King) attempts to be both a remake of, and a sequel to, the original Deathstalker (although without mentioning the name Deathstalker at all).

The protagonist of this 90-minute oddity is not only trying to retrieve the same three magic items as Deathstalker did (the Sword of Justice, the Amulet of Life and the Chalice of Magic), but is also facing a villainous wizard of the same name, Munkar, who has - once again - organised a tournament to find the best warrior in the land.

The faux Deathstalker here is the most-well groomed barbarian in cinematic history Kane (former Mr Universe and American Gladiator Michael O'Hearn), a love 'em-and-leave 'em wandering rogue who - for some inexplicable reason - gets drawn into saving the princess (Irina Grigoryeva) and restoring her father King Kandor (Yuri Petrov) to the throne after he was usurped by Munkar (Martin Kove of Cobra Kai, Karate Kid and Cagney & Lacey fame).

However what makes Barbarian its own, bizarre, entity is the introduction of Kane's sidekick, Wooby (Yuri Danilchenko), a cross between an ewok and a child in a rubbish Cowardly Lion Halloween costume, who squeaks and wobbles his way through the plot until the movie's climax, where he disappears and is never heard from again.

A bevvy of Ukrainian lovelies add the eye-candy and random topless moments, although as well as recycling the plot of Deathstalker, Barbarian also digs up vast tracts of old footage from the original film - mostly around the all-important banquet/orgy scene where not only does the Pig-Man appear once again but we also get the strange sight of the true Deathstalker (Rick Hill) watching the events unfold from the side-lines as well as a return appearance by Codille (Barbi Benton)!

However, this is even more surreal as an opening exposition flashback suggests that the events of Barbarian take place generations after Deathstalker - the "timeline" is even broken up with images of Roman soldiers - although there is never any suggestion that Barbarian is supposed to take place on our world!

For all this random weirdness, lacklustre dialogue and variable fight choreography, Barbarian still stands head-and-shoulders above Deathstalker II - Duel Of The Titans and that's even factoring in Wooby, who I'd heard was on a par with Jar-Jar Binks.

I'd take Wooby any time over Jar-Jar, at least he has some uses (he knows healing magic and is probably quite warm for those long, cold nights out in the wilderness).

Isekai? It's Narnia Business!

Isekai (Japanese: 異世界; transl. 'different world', 'another world', or 'other world') is a sub-genre of fiction. It includes novels, light novels, films, manga, webtoons, anime, and video games that revolve around a person or people who are transported to and have to survive in another world, such as a fantasy world, game world, or parallel universe, with or without the possibility of returning to their original world.

Portal fantasy, also called portal-quest fantasy, gateway fantasy or crossworld fantasy, is a plot device in speculative fiction, particularly fantasy fiction and science fiction, in which characters enter a self-contained fantasy world through a portal, typically within a quest-based narrative that focuses on exploring and navigating that world. Portal fantasy works typically feature protagonists who enter alternate realities, explore unfamiliar landscapes, and encounter distinctive characters. Overall, portals in speculative fiction act as catalysts for narrative movement, worldbuilding, and thematic exploration.

With a new vision of C.S. Lewis's Narnia coming to Netflix at the end of the year and the fact that I am listening to the BBC radio play adaptations of The Complete Chronicles of Narnia, I'm entertaining different approaches to hooking players into any future fantasy roleplaying setting I conjure up.

Given that the current hot contender for "game du jour" is the upcoming video game and anime-inspired Twilight Sword, I can't help but be drawn to the concept of isekai (see the definition above if you're not au fait with the term) - although I don't know if it would be appropriate for that particular game (on the other hand it is baked into Break!! as a core character concept).

But, more specifically, my current travels in Narnia have got me wondering about the idea of "child adventurers".

I know these days this is a much more common concept - thanks to the ubiquity of Stranger Things, a whole heap of anime, and RPGs like Tales From The Loop and Kids on Bikes -  but it's an idea that takes me back to the early days of Steve's Villains & Vigilantes campaign in the 1980's, where a core concept was you play "yourself with superpowers".

You didn't roll random numbers to generate your statistics, but rather you and your fellow players 'graded' each other on a scale of three to 18 for the the primary stats of your characters, then you generated random superpowers and bingo! That was how the Acrobatic Flea was born.

But, of course, the big difference between superhero roleplaying games and Dungeons & Dragons-style fantasy adventures is that supers games are generally skewed towards keeping the player characters alive, where as dungeon delvers tend to be fragile, little snowflakes when they are just starting out.

There is a long literary tradition of "child adventurers" - in fact many of my favourite books have juvenile or young adult protagonists (e.g. Philip Reeves Mortal Engines saga, The Wizard of Oz and, of course, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland) - but literary tropes don't necessary work as written in a roleplaying format.

I like the idea of "Earth" men and women traveling to an alien world (e.g Edgar Rice Burrough's John Carter books), as it means you don't need to explain everything to the players beforehand and they can explore the world as they go along, and I have no qualms about tooling up imaginary child characters with swords and bows, but what are the logistics of such a starting point?

How would I go about generating statistics for the player-characters? Would the players play younger versions of themselves (as per Villains & Vigilantes) or roll new characters? How would players, particularly those who were parents, feel about putting (fictional) young characters in harm's way?

I'm On A Crunchyroll

As well as helping me get my Christmas shopping finished nice and early, this year's Black Friday also saw Amazon  offering some cut-price Prime Video subscription deals for the many, many channels available through its central hub.

So, I got myself a sub to Crunchyroll, which I'd been circling for months.

But what is Crunchyroll, you may ask?

Google summarises it as follows:

Crunchyroll is a streaming service for anime and other Japanese entertainment, owned by Sony Group Corporation. It offers a vast library of anime series, films, and manga, with content available to stream both with original Japanese audio and subtitles or with English dubs.

I had two main reasons for this subscription: (a) I was fed up waiting for more episodes of My Hero Academia to be released on blu-ray and wanted to see the final season and the spin-off series, Vigilantes; and (b) I wanted to see what other fantasy anime were available that gave off similar vibes to my new favourite shows: Delicious in Dungeon and Frieren: Beyond Journey's End.

Now, I knew there were a LOT of animes out there, but I don't think I was fully ready for the full Crunchyroll library (and this is nowhere close to all the animes, as there are several other streamers offering similar content, such as Prime Video itself and Netflix, the home of the Studio Ghibli movies).

The first thing I did was finish season seven of MHA, but then I wanted to save the show's final season and spin-off, allowing myself time to explore what else there was in Crunchyroll's portfolio.

I make no bones about the fact that I suffer decision paralysis when being faced by too many options, but endlessly scrolling through the shows and movies I now had access to nearly melted my little brain.

I watched the first episodes (or two) of several almost random choices that looked like what I was looking for - which is really easy when episodes are a little over 20 minutes long - but found myself being extremely persnickety. They were good, but not EXACTLY what I was hunting for.

One thing I did quickly learn though is that I much prefer anime that's dubbed into English. When I was watching Japanese language shows I found the subtitles were changing much too fast and I couldn't keep-up and was also missing the visuals while trying to read.

This is odd because I watch subtitled movies and a lot of Japanese documentaries on NHK World-Japan and have no issue with their subtitles.

I've currently settled on The Water Magician, which is - so far - an easy-going isekai serial with 12 episodes in its first season.

Being a lifelong fan of Alice in Wonderland and The Wizard of Oz, I'm interested in the the isekai genre as it's something I've often thought about introducing - somehow - into a roleplaying game set-up. A number of recent Japanese-inspired systems I've been looking at fully embrace the idea of "people from our world finding themselves in a fantasy world".

Of course, I've now found my own fantasy world - Crunchyroll - and may be lost for some time as I ferret around to find the magical MacGuffin that will solve all my problems... or give me the inspiration I need for my next roleplaying campaign.

HALLOWEEN HORROR: Pearl (2022)

After what feels like an age, the long-awaited prequel to Ti West's ultraviolent X, Pearl has arrived here in UK homes.

But the wait was most definitely worth it. Pearl is a tour de force character piece, with the phenomenally charismatic Mia Goth a genuine force of nature as the titular lead.

As her husband (Alistair Sewell) is away fighting in The Great War, mentally unbalanced Pearl has to stay on the isolated family farm in rural Texas, with her parents.

With the farmhands gone to the war, Pearl has to take her care of her severely-disabled, wheelchair-bound father (Matthew Sunderland) while also helping to keep the farm running with depleting livestock and finances.

All under the harsh gaze and strict rules of her domineering mother, Ruth (Tandi Wright).

The closest Pearl has to a real friend is her sister-in-law, Mitsy (Emma Jenkins-Purro), but even she only knows the 'surface Pearl', the hardworking farmgirl, rather than the 'real Pearl'.

Pearl lives in a fantasy world, dreaming of a life as a dancer on the silver screen, her escape from being trapped by circumstance on the farm.

Her life starts to change when she befriends the charming, Bohemian projectionist (David Corenswet), who runs the cinema in the nearby town.

She shares with him the news that Mitsy has told her about an upcoming audition for a travelling dance troupe, and he encourages her to pursue her dreams.

Naturally, Pearl's mother is having none of this, not only will she not allow Pearl to abandon her essential chores at home, but Ruth knows the 'real Pearl' and believes it is best for her daughter to stay where she is.

Matters escalate and rapidly get out of hand as Pearl's barely-suppressed rage surfaces, farm implements are employed incorrectly and people start to die in a gruesome fashion. 

As the prequel to X, Pearl is a contained study of a rapidly crumbling psyche, delivered with unparalleled gusto by the wholly convincing - and totally unnerving - Mia Goth.

Mia co-wrote the film with director Ti West, and it shows how deeply she understands the main character, and why nobody else could have played her.

More than just a prequel though, Pearl is the origin story of a messed-up serial killer that perfectly foreshadows the horrors that would go down decades later (in X), while working perfectly well on their own to create a fully-rounded slasher.

Slipping between fantasy and reality, Pearl is a blend of Psycho and The Wizard of Oz, complete with a couple of deranged dance numbers, some hypnotically disturbing monologues, and the most terrifying rictus smile since The Man Who Laughs.

Pearl is one of those films that gets under your skin and scratches away at your brain, a movie that will stay with you for a long time. While the main plot is minimal, the story and character at the heart of Pearl have a lasting quality that makes for great cinema.

The concluding part of the X trilogy, MaXXXine follows the sole survivor (Mia Goth) of the events in X as she tries to make a name for herself in the adult film industry of 1980's Los Angeles. It is expected to be released early next year.

YellowBrickRoad (2010)

"One morning in New England, 1940, the entire population of Friar, New Hampshire - 572 people - walked together up a winding mountain trail and into the wilderness. They left behind their clothes, their money, all of their essentials. Even their dogs were abandoned, tied to posts and left to starve.

"No-one knows why. A search party dispatched by the U.S. Army eventually discovered the remains of nearly 300 of Friar's evacuees. Many had frozen to death. Others were cruelly and mysteriously slaughtered. The bodies of the remaining citizens are still unaccounted for.

"Over the years, a quiet cover-up operation managed to weave the story of Friar into the stuff of legends and backwoods fairy tales. The town has slowly repopulated, but the vast wilderness is mostly untracked, with the northern-most stretches off limits to local hunters and loggers.

"In 2008, the coordinates for the "YELLOWBRICKROAD" trail head were declassified. The first official expedition into a dark and twisted wilderness will attempt to solve the mystery of the lost citizens of Friar...and reach the end of the trail."

- plot summary from IMDB.

YellowBrickRoad, from the writing/directing team of Andy Mitton and Jess Holland, is frustratingly close to genius.

The powerful set-up (detailed above) had me hooked from the outset with its Lovecraftian overtones and engaging mystery, and this certainly isn't a movie that spoonfeeds answers to its audience.

I love a good mental challenge as much as the next person and films that don't necessarily spell out everything that's going on, but YellowBrickRoad suffers because - in a similar way to Lost - it is ultimately too obscure and obtuse.

While it is certainly a film that will stay with you as you try to ponder what fate befell the inhabitants of Friar - and the contemporary expedition  - I don't believe there are actually enough clues to adequately fill in the gaps.

As the the research team - which includes Smallville's Cassidy Freeman and her brother Clark Freeman (they also executive produced the movie) - get further up the trail, and into the mountains, they hear spectral 1940s music from ahead of them, which gets louder as they head north.

The sounds come and go as the journey progresses, but it appears to be having strange effects on some of the group, including memory loss, increased tension and confusion.

The unnerving suggestion that fixed points, directions and co-ordinates change depending on which way you are heading is the genuine stuff of nightmares.

The cinematography and audio effects are superb, although the editing and direction is occasionally jumpy (this, however, may be a deliberate ploy to heighten the hallucinogenic effects of the trail), that if nothing else makes this a gorgeous horror film to experience (I can only imagine how awesome some sequences - such as the auditory assault on the senses - would have been in a cinema).

We can easily pick up on the effects the music - and possibly even the environment - is having on the walkers, as well as clues such as the co-ordinates of the trailhead, the worn copy of the Wizard Of Oz in the town's picture house, the fact that people in the 1940s sought escape in the cinema etc., which kind of tie-in with the bizarre, rather leftfield ending, but there isn't enough indication of either the 'how' or 'why' to put together our own theories of what is going on.

I think I picked up on all the other Wizard Of Oz references - the scarecrow scene is particularly horrific and well done, but I wish there had been more moments like that (did I miss the Cowardly Lion and the Tin Man?).

Not that I necessarily wanted more gore. Great horror can unsettle you by mere suggestion alone (cf. The Haunting) and YellowBrickRoad does do a lot of creepy stuff with its sound effects and surreal disorientation but I think the film was simply too big, too ambitious, for its makers and got away from them in the end.

Stylistically, and thematically, YellowBrickRoad reminded me of two of my favourite horrors - The Blair Witch Project (although thankfully this isn't another 'found footage' movie) and In The Mouth Of Madness - and for the majority its 96 minute run I was convinced that YellowBrickRoad would be joining these two in the ranks of my personal greats.

Then it doesn't so much as fall apart at the end (as I can see where the story was trying to go, with the brief flash of the ghostly images etc) as simply come to a hurried conclusion.

During the build-up I found myself so engrossed in the on-screen developments that I didn't want the film to end and when it did, it did it in a most unsatisfactory, and slightly messed-up, way.

We were left with too many unanswered questions and not even a general suggestion as to where we might find answers.

Yet, for all its faults I can certainly see myself revisiting YellowBrickRoad, just to see if I missed any clues along the way, even though I'm totally convinced I'm never going to get all the answers I'm looking for.

Part of the frustration with this film is that, if you let it, it can really get under your skin. Like it or not, you are not going to forget your journey on the YellowBrickRoad in a hurry.